The Golden Medallion
by flaminglake
Summary: Basically a series of short extracts from Halt's life up until he leaves Hibernia. Spoliers for book 8. Explains the amulet he has in my story, "Our Darkest Night" but you don't need to read that to read this.


**WARNING: SPOILERS FOR BOOK 8!**

**Disclamer: I do not own ranger apprentice or any of it's related places, names, people etc. I mean, come on, if I did, I would hardly be writing bad fanfiction about it, would I?**

**AN: Hey everyone. Hm, so I don't know how many of you have read my fanfiction, "Our Darkest Night" (the rewrite of Secret War), but this is a one shot based around that. In "Our Darkest Night" Halt has a medallion that he keeps in a pouch around his neck and he treasures it, often speaking to a girl (Caitlyn) in his mind. So this is the story of how the medallion came to be. **

**But don't worry, you don't have to have read "Our Darkest Night" to read this. **

**Now, the random moment of realisation: Crowley has red hair! Red hair! And all through "Our Darkest Night" I was referring to him as the blond boy... now I'll go reread the whole series and imagine him with red hair this time...**

**A Golden Medallion **

The boat rocked gently on the waves, not far out from the harbour. Beside it, a second boat was positioned, full of armed and alert guards. They were probably unnessesary, but one never could take chances with the king.

For it was King Ronan on the small fishing boat. For once, he wasn't in his royal garments, just a simple tunic and cloak, albeit a warm, well made one. His hair, usually slicked back, was blowing arround his face, his moustache and beard untidy.

"A pull!" he said triumphantly, as his fishing rod tugged in his hands. He braced himself, ready to reel in the fish.

"Fish! Fish!" Three years old and glowing with enthusiasm was Prince Ferris. He flapped his arms cheerfully, pursing his lips to imitate a fish's mouth.

Queen Hayley laughed softly. She ruffled her sons hair, ignoring his protests. "I'm glad you're having fun, at least."

She glanced down at Ferris's identical twin. Halt was curled up in her lap, groaning.

"I don't think Halt has sea legs," Hayley said smiling.

"Ah, he'll get used to the ocean," King Ronan said. "He's my son after all and I'm- Aha, look at this one!"

He held up his catch, grinning at the silver glinting scales. It was a decent sized fish.

"Big fish! Big fish!" Ferris cried, his chubby hands reaching out for it.

Ronan tossed the fish to the only servant on board the ship. He'd brought the man along to gut and clean the fish.

"Bad fish," Halt groaned.

Ferris looked at his brother. His lips twitched downwards, his big brown eyes widening. "Halt sad?"

His face brightened and he threw his arms around his twin. "Hugging Halt better!"

Halt managed to uncurl. "Better now," he said, a look of surprise on his young face.

Hayley laughed. Probably her son had gotten used to the motion of the boat, but she liked to think Ferris's hug had something to do with it. She hoped they would continue to be a happy family for many years to come.

…...

Five year old Ferris and Halt sat together in the waiting room, swinging their legs. The Assistant healers had given them a fruit tart each while they waited. Ferris munched on his happily. Halt was more reserved. He was too nervous to eat.

"Will it be a girl or a boy?" Halt asked his twin.

"Boy," Ferris replied through a mouthful of tart. "He can come fishing with us then."

Haltt frowned. "Girls can go fishing too."

"Nah ah," Ferris swallowed. He looked pointedly at Halt's tart. Halt gave it to him. He took a large mouthful before continueing. "Mummy doesn't go fishing no more. Daddy said it's better that way 'cause it's a sport for men."

"I thought she just didn't want to go fishing with us," Halt said. He thought about it, then added. "_I _don't want to go fishing."

"Only 'cause you never catch fish," Ferris retorted. "I caught the biggest fish in the whole wide world last time."

Halt kicked his shin. "Daddy helped you though."

"So?"

"So it's cheating!"

"Nah ah."

"Prince Halt, Prince Ferris." One of the assitants beckoned to them. "They're ready for you."

Halt and Ferris exchanged a glance. They dropped to the ground and followed the assitant into the room.

Queen Hayley smiled wearily at them. Ronan lifted his sons onto the bed to sit beside their mother.

"It's a girl," Ronan said, his voice strangely cold. Here in the castle, he was nothing like when he was fishing. He was neat and presentable, with an unmistakable air of power around him.

Hayley was holding the baby, a small, delicate thing. "Halt, Ferris," she said. "This is your new sister, Caitlyn."

Ferris poked Caitlyn's cheek. "I wanted a brother," he complained. The girl stirred, but didn't cry.

Halt stared with fascination at the baby. He couldn't help thinking, what if she doesn't like me?

"Now we're an even bigger, even happier family," Hayley said.

…...

"You're lucky, Halt," Ferris said one day, while they were sitting in the rose gardens.

Halt looked up in surprise. "Why?"

"You get to be king." Ferris explained. "I want to be king."

Halt blinked. "Well, I don't."

Ferris grinned. "No? Can I be king then?"

Halt nodded. "Yeah. You can be king and I can be an adventurer, like in the stories." The stories he was referring to were told by Jonathen, a man originally from Araluen who told stories of adventurers conquering battles. The stories were usually accompanied by songs which he played on his lute.

"Okay!" Ferris leapt to his feet. "Let's tell dad!"

But their father, for reasons the boys couldn't fathom, only laughed.

…...

Caitlyn O' Carrick sat on her mothers lap.

"Happy birthday, lovely," Hayley said.

"Happy birthday," Halt and Ferris chanted together.

Caitlyn shifted to look around. "Daddy?" she asked.

Hayley kissed her forehead. "Daddy couldn't be here today. He's very busy with being king."

Halt sensed an underlying bitterness in his mothers words. Was his father really so busy that he couldn't spare a few minutes to celebrate his daughters third birthday?

Ferris had other things on his mind. "When do we get to eat the cake?"

Halt shook his head. Typical.

"What do you think Cait?" Hayley asked. "Do you want cake?"

Caitlyn nodded.

"Yay! I'll go get it!" Ferris cheered.

Hayley regarded her son dryly. "No, I think _I'll _go get it." Then, she ruffled Ferris's hair in the manner she so often did. "You can come with me though. Halt, will you look after Caitlyn?"

"Yeah," Halt said. Despite himself, he felt a flutter of jealousy at his mother's close bond with Ferris. She never ruffled _his _hair. He shook his head. He didn't want her touching his hair anyway.

"Daddy?" Caitlyn asked again. Halt shrugged.

"He's not coming, remember?" he said.

"Why not?" Caitlyn fixed her dark eyes on Halt. He hesitated.

"He's busy," He said carefully. "Here, do you want my present to you now?"

"Aha," Caitlyn smiled.

"Here you go," Halt handed her a wrapped up package with an unseen sigh of relief.

She pulled at the ribbon, then stopped. "Halt?"

"Yes?"

"Smile!"

And she had such an innocent, cute expression that he couldn't help a rare smile gracing his face.

"Yay, Halt smiled! Mummy says smiling is for happy people. But Halt never smiles. Are you happy Halt?"

He'd never heard her say so much in one time. He looked away, out the small window that looked over Dun Kilty's courtyarad. He was happiest when he was outdoors. But he wasn't _unhappy_ indoors.

Hayley came back with the cake, a greatly decorated affair with pink frosting. She sliced them all a piece and they ate.

"Present time," Hayley said when the last crumbs had been licked by Ferris.

"I have a special present for you Cait," the Queen reached under her collar and pulled out a necklade. It was a golden chain, a large round amulet in the center engraved with strange symbols.

"This is a good luck charm. It is meant to bring the wearer happiness wherever they are. You might not understand now, but it is very valuable. It belonged to your grandfather and his grandfather before that."

She placed it around Caitlyn's neck and did up the clasp. "There you look very pretty."

Halt leaned in to examine it. "What are those symbols?" he asked.

"It's an ancient Hibernian dialogue," Hayley told him. "I can't read most of it. I do know that this symbol here," she placed a long, painted fingernail over one symbol, "means happy family."

"A happy family like us," Ferris said.

"Exactly. We are the happiest family in this land and beyond."

If we are so happy, Halt thought, why isn't dad here for Caitlyn's birthday?

…...

When Halt and Ferris were ten years old, their father summoned them to his study. He was seated behind a furnished wooden desk, looking very serious.

"Pull up a chair," he told them and they did so.

"What is it dad?" Ferris asked.

King Ronan sighed deeply. "You are no longer little boys," he said. "Please refrain from calling me dad. You may address me as my lord or, if you must, father."

Ferris sat back, hurt showing clearly on his features.

Their father looked beaten, Halt noticed. Worn down.

"It is time for us to talk about heirs. Halt, you are first in line to the throne, as I'm sure you've realised."

Halt nodded, wondering where this was going.

"As such, when I die-"

"God forbid," Ferris said seriously.

"Ferris, this does not concern you. Halt, when I die, you will be king. It is time you learnt about the responsibilities you will have."

Halt blinked. Responsibilities? He hadn't thought about that at all. He'd always had an image of himself going on great horse treks as soon as he was old enough to escape his fathers rules. Beyond that, nothing had crossed his mind.

"First of all, there are classes I have set up for you. Here is you lesson time table." He passed Halt a slip of paper.

The words on the page spun around, not making any sense at all.

"You will have theory classes in the mornings, battle tactics, diplomacy, languages, history and Hibernian studies. Then there is the physical classes. Ferris, you will take these as well as I want both my sons to grow into repectible gentlemen. You will be taking a little bit of archery and going on hunts with the hunting patrols, horse riding and, most importantly, Swordsmanship."

"I have to do all that!" Halt burst out.

"What about fishing?" Ferris whined.

Ronan stood abrupty. "I know it is a lot Halt, but if you do this I will be very proud of you."

"What about me?" Ferris asked. "Will you be proud of me?"

Ronan rubbed his eyes. "Aye, son, if you achieve a repectible level, I will be proud of you too. Ferris, you may leave. Halt, I want some words with you, king to king."

"Right," Halt said, trying to ignore the tears he could see in his twins eyes at being left out. Ferris is a crybaby, he forced himself to think, if only so he didn't have to listen to the guilt plaguing him. He had seen the pictures of crowns stuck on Ferris's bedroom walls and he knew the throne was one thing Ferris would never have.

…...

Halt's days were a lot busier. He had private lessons with his theory tutors, who seemed to be competing with each other on who could dish out the most homework and who could cram his brain with the most knowledge in the shortest amount of time.

Then there was the exhausting physical exercises with Ferris. Worst of all, were the sword fighting lessons.

Their tutor, Sir Darnley, was a broad shoulder, well muscled man, with a wide moustache that bristled when he was angry.

"Side cut! Overhand! Block! Parry! Sidecut!"

Ferris dropped his sword. He doubled over, breathing hard.

Halt, sweat pouring from his face, grabbed his twin's arm.

"Come on, Ferris," he groaned. "You can do it."

"Go Ferris!" Caitlyn, who had come to watch, cried.

Ferris shook his head. Sir Darnley laughed.

"You fat pig!" he said. "What? Can't take exercise?"

Halt glowered at the knight. Ferris wasn't fat, far from it. He might eat a lot, but the constant exercise Sir Darnley had him doing prevented him from gaining too much weight. While he wasn't as fit as Halt, he was lean.

"Shut up, Darnley," Halt growled.

"Halt!" Caitlyn squeaked.

Sir Darnley stepped toward Halt, grabbing the front of his collar and pulling him closer, so that Halt could feel his hot breath.

"You call me 'sir' boy! I don't care how high and mighty you think you are, a prince under my teaching is no better than an ordinary person!"

"Do you treat ordinary people this badly too?"

"Watch your tongue, you insolent brat!"

"I'm sorry," Halt shrugged carelessly. "Do you treat ordinary people this badly too, _sir?"_

Darnley's face flushed red with anger. "Both of you, run around the castle! Come back with a rock. A big rock, or I'll make you do it again!"

Ferris groaned, tears in his eyes.

"Not likely!" Halt snapped, drawing himself up to his full height.

Darnley crossed his arms, shaking with his effort not to strike the crown prince. "My order's are to turn you two brats into repected knights. You will do what I say or I will talk to your father and report your rebellion. Do you really think he'll be pleased?"

Halt scowled. He'd already tried to speak to his father about Darnley, to no avail.

"Come on then, Ferris." He dragged his little brother to his feet and the two of them started jogging around the cobbled courtyard, Ferris wheezing with the effort, Halt drenched with sweat but refusing to give up.

It felt like hours, but they finally stumbled back to the courtyard. Their mother was there waiting for them. She clapped her hands in delight.

Darnley's face wrinkled in distaste. "That will be all for today," he said.

"Wonderful," Hayley giggled. "My precious boys turning into fine young knights. Knights to protect our happy family."

Ferris, about to collapse from exhaustion, grinned. "Aye mother," he said.

Caitlyn wrapped one skinny arm around Halt's waist. "Good job," she whispered.

He sighed deeply. "We have to train hard to protect our happy family," he said, mimicking his mother.

…...

"Fishing trip!" Ferris cried happily.

King Ronan nodded sternly to his son. It had been Ferris's wish that for his birthday they go on a fishing trip. Halt hadn't got his wish – that people would leave him alone. But when he looked into his twin's sparkling eyes, he decided it wasn't so bad.

Queen Hayley was coming as well, and Caitlyn. It had been a long time since their mother had gone with them on a trip.

Caitlyn sidled up to Halt. "Is it fun?" she asked, with the innocence of a six year old who had never been fishing.

"No," Halt said shortly.

She deflated and he touched her shoulder lightly. "Well, it's not so bad," he relented.

She beamed.

King Ronan led the way onto the boat. Halt was surprised to find that he was oddly disappointed when he saw his father was still dressed like a king. The last time they had gone, about a year or two ago, he'd dressed more humbly.

Halt and Ferris loaded the boat with bait, rods and lunch. Halt saw Ferris sneaking biscuits, but didn't have the heart to sell him out.

"Hurry up, wife," Ronan snapped.

Hayley bristled. She lifted Caitlyn onto the boat and stepped aboard herself.

They set off. Halt leaned over the side of the boat, feeling more than a little quezy.

Caitlyn touched his back. "Halt?"

"'m fine."

"He get's sea sick," Ferris declared.

Halt flushed. "Do not," he said shortly.

"This looks like a good spot to fish," Ronan interrupted.

Ferris immediately focused on casting his line. Halt breathed deeply, allowing himself to become accustomed to the motion of the waves.

"How are your lessons going?" Ronan asked as he cast his line.

Hayley rolled her eyes. "Again with the lessons," she said. Caitlyn touched her mothers arm lightly, looking vagually concerned at the tension in the air.

"Quiet wife," Ronan demanded.

"The lesson's are going really well," Ferris said quickly, eager to stop any argument on his birthday.

"Not you. Halt?"

"Fine," Halt said.

"Excellent," Ronan said, settling back to wait for a bite.

"Excellent," Ferris mimicked in a high, mocking voice. "You are going to be king after all."

There was a note of bitterness that Halt had never heard before.

"That's right, I suppose," he said carefully. Ferris snorted with disdain. There seemed to be a weight in the air as they all strained to feel happy. No one wanted to start a fight on the twins' birthday.

Halt sighed and watched the waves cresting over the calm water. The breeze was salty, but refreshing. He liked the great outdoors, even if he wasn't a sea fan.

He watched his fathers stiff back. King Ronan kept glancing at the second boat, full of high ranking Knights for their protection. Aside from these occasional fishing trips, Ronan never left the safety of the castle.

And suddenly, Halt realised what his life as king was going to be like. He would be confined in the stuffy prison that was Dun Kilty, rarely exposed to the natural elements. He could never leave Hibernia and go on long rides over the countryside. What would he have to live for?

Caitlyn would be married off to some nobleman, perhaps leaving Dun Kilty. Halt could grow old, lonely, with no friends, surrounded by the stuck up nobles and idealistic servants.

He didn't want to be king. He didn't want to be king. He really, really, didn't want to be king!

"Halt!" Caitlyn cried. He ducked his head, trying in vain to hide the shameful tears that had sprung to his eyes. He rubbed furiously at his face. He wasn't a crybaby like Ferris.

Hayley hugged him. "What is it love? Is the sea sickness that bad?"

Halt shook his head, unable to stop his shoulders from shaking. He saw Ronan's disappointed frown in his peripheral vision.

"You're such a girl Halt," Ferris laughed.

Halt pushed his mother and sister away, balancing on the balls of his feet, feeling the motion of the boat under him. "_I'm _a girl! You cry every second day, you damned crybaby!"

Shocked, Hayley pulled Ferris close. "Halt, don't be so horrible to your brother!"

"Of course you take his side. You always take his side!" Halt yelled, now unable to stop.

"Maybe that is because Ferris is a better son than you are," Hayley said, her hazel eyes tearing up. Halt swallowed thickly. He'd always known his mother prefferred Ferris. _Always_. She loved his expressions, his smiles, the glowing air around him when he was happy. Not at all like Halt, who simply couldn't understand how his twin was so expressive.

"That is enough!"

Silence, broken only by the breaking waves and the cries of a dozen or so seagulls above them.

King Ronan frowned at them all. "Halt, do not get so mad at your brother. You have something he does not. You will be king."

"I don't want to be the king," Halt said quietly, wearily, the anger drained out of him.

"I'll do it!" Ferris said, his face shining with glee. "I'll take his place as king!"

"You cannot be king," Ronan said sternly. "You are not my first born."

"But-"

"Ferris that is enough. You are my sons and you are both fine sons, but Halt is my heir and Ferris, you are not."

Hayley hugged Ferris tighter. "If you cannot have the crown, you can have my love, whole heartidly," Hayley said.

Ferris leaned into her. He allowed her to hold him and comfort him as the tears fell from his eyes.

"And you called me a girl," Halt hissed, turning away in digust. He would have traded all the crowns in the world for his mothers love. But it seemed she had eyes for only one twin.

"What's wrong with girls?" Caitlyn asked.

"Nothing," Hayley replied. "Nothing is wrong with girls and you and Ferris are both very important members of our family. Our warm, happy family."

Our warm, happy family. She said it all the time. It didn't make it true.

…...

Halt shifted awkwarly, embarrassed at the amount of people present. It was their first assessment in sword fighting, after nearly a year of training. King Ronan was surrounded by his guards and servants, looking very official. Queen Hayley was standing with Caitlyn, deliberate distance between them and the king. Aside from the royal party, many of the soldiers had turned up, purely out of interest.

Sir Darnley clapped his hands together. "Let us begin. This is a simple assessment. You are required to disarm your opponant."

He handed them both swords. Halt took his, watching the glinting silver in the sunlight. That silver had killed a man before, he knew. He took a deep breath, calming the nerves that had suddenly sprung. Ferris faced him. Their eyes met over the ground between them. Ferris held his gaze for longer than he usually could, showing his determination to win.

"Begin," Sir Darnley said.

The boys circled each other. The soldiers called encouragement, then realised the king was sitting behind them and their calls fell silent.

Ferris lunged forward. Halt deflected the blade, following the movement up with an upward cut. Ferris responded and soon they were duelling fiercely.

Halt forced himself to ignore the crowd and to instead focus on the little movements Ferris made that would help him predict his next move. When Sir Darnley spoke about the swordcraft, he spoke about the balde as a natural extension of his body. He had an undeniable passion for his craft, despite all his bad qualities, a passion which Halt lacked. To the heir, fighting was all calculations, predicting his enemies blows and blocking them with practised movements.

He decided now was the time to go on the offensive. He feinted an overhand, then switched it to a side cut. Of course, he stopped before he hit Ferris's body, but the unexpected move had thrown his twin off guard and he stepped back, momentarily losing his concentration. It gave Halt the chance to smack the sword from Ferris's hand and send it clattering on the cobblestones.

He lowered his own sword, breathing heavily. Sir Darnley clapped him on the shoulder, looking pleased. King Ronan was also delighted.

"Excellent, excellent," he said. "Halt, I am very proud of you. Keep up the good work."

Halt attempted a wan smile, but his eyes were drawn to Ferris's furious face. He half expected his twin to break down in tears. Ferris stormed past him, shoving him out the way and Halt realised his emotions had been chanelled away from tears and into anger.

Caitlyn hugged her older brother. Halt put an arm around her absently, still worried about Ferris.

King Ronan slipped a gold coin to Sir Darnley, just because the duel had been so good. He nodded at Halt.

"We do have a happy family," he said proudly. Halt disagreed.

…...

"Lessons are going well, I presume?" King Ronan asked over dinner one night.

Ferris, by now, knew this was not directed at him and he glowered at his plate. Halt nodded and tried to catch his twins eye, but Ferris refused to look at him.

He sighed focused on his food, Ferris's favourite shrimp dish. Caitlyn was silent as well. She touched Halt's hand under the table.

"Ferris really wants to be king, doesn't he?" she whispered to Halt. He nodded inconspiciously.

"He always has," he murmured back to her. "He doesn't know what he already has." Mothers whole hearted love hung on the air between them.

"Maybe you don't know what you have also," Caitlyn pointed out. Halt frowned and shook his head slightly. All he had was the throne and that was hardly worthwhile. He didn't even want it.

"You don't know what you're talking about," he said abruptly. She was, after all, only seven years old.

"You have the throne," she told him. "That is something Ferris really wants and not just for fathers approval. I think there is some deep set longing there."

Halt snorted. "And when did you become so wise?"

She puffed up her chest and flicked back her long, dark hair. "I am the royal princess of Clonmel," she said. "I am wise and noble and beautiful."

"Wise my foot, silly little girl," Halt said, his affectionate tone contrasting to his words.

She beamed at him.

"I shall retire to the bedroom after this meal," Queen Hayley announced. "Have a nice evening, my dears."

The siblings all mumured their goodnights and retired to their own separate rooms. Halt swayed as he walked up the long, spiral staircase to his room. His vision blurred and he paused, leaning heavily against the railing to regain himself. He made his way to his chambers carefully. Obviously, he'd had too many late nights and was tired. He curled up in his bed without changing clothes and was soon asleep.

The next morning, the servants couldn't wake him.

…...

Caitlyn sat beside her brothers bed. He had finally regained consciousness after half a week. He was weak still, but lucid.

She held his sweaty hand in her own and stroked the dark hair back off his forehead. He smiled at her concern.

"m'fine," he said.

"You aren't fine!" Caitlyn blinked back tears. "You were so ill! I was scared..." her voice broke and trailed off.

Halt ruffled her hair. "alright now."

She rubbed at her eyes. "I know, I know. Just... you won't ever leave me, will you?"

"Course not," Halt grinned.

"Not ever?"

"Never. I promise." He raised himself on one shoulder to stare into her eyes. "What about you? Father will no doubt have marriege plans for you when you get older. Will you move away?"

"No! I wouldn't!" Caitlyn squeezed his hand. "Even if he insisted, I wouldn't!"

"Good. So we'll be close forever then."

"Forever," Caitlyn repeated.

"I'm glad." Halt let himself fall back onto the bed. His eyes slid shut.

"Don't die!" Caitlyn burst out before she could restrain herself.

"I'm not going to die," Halt said, his eyes still closed. "I'm just tired. Let me sleep, alright?"

Caitlyn nodded, forgetting that his eyes were closed and he couldn't see her. She watched as his breath deepened and he slipped away into sleep. She kissed his hand.

She removed her golden amulet from around her neck and placed it on his chest. "For good luck," she murmured. "For strength."

Whether it was the amulet or not, he was soon fully recovered. Ferris wasn't as pleased as one might expect, but he shook such thoughts away. He returned the amulet to Caitlyn and she wore it around her neck as she always had. It was almost trademark for the princess to be seen with the strange amulet engraved with runes.

…...

For his fouteenth birthday, Ferris didn't ask for a fishing trip. He didn't ask for anything at all, except good food. Ferris had been eating more and more food lately. He'd turned to it as a comfort of sorts and as such, his figure was becoming softer and less defined.

Sir Darnley had noticed this and was working them hard as ever. He called Ferris names to try to get him to start eating healthy. Halt didn't stand up for his twins. He remembered vaguely a time when he would have, but that was no more than a memory. Ever since he'd become violently ill, from what the healers told him was soiled shrimp, there had been a tension between him and his twin, one that went way past Ferris's jealousy. It was something else, something he coudn't place.

At first, he'd tried to bridge the gap that had grown between them with memories of their early childhood fishing, but to no avail and now that a year had passed since his illness, he'd become accustomed to the distance. It would be weird to be good brothers again now.

It was that time of the year again. Examination day for sword craft. It was coincidence that the date had fallen on the twins birthday. While the population of Clonmel were celebrating a royal birthday, Halt and Ferris were preparing for their annual duel.

"Good luck Halt!" Caitlyn called. She always took Halt's side. To balance it out, Hayley called encouragement to Ferris.

"Let's do this already," Ferris said, drawing his sword. "Bring it on, Halt. Today will be the day I humiliate you and father finally sees that you are unfit to be king."

Halt glanced at their father reflexitively; he had come to watch, of course. He was too far away to hear the queitly spoken words.

"I doubt it," Halt said, playing along. He was vaguelly disturbed at how serious Ferris was.

"Hyaa!" Ferris yelled and ran at him, swinging his sword. Halt blocked each stroke.

Ferris was much better than the last time they had duelled. Sweat trickled down Halt's face as he tried to focus on where the blade would fall next. He moved to parry a shot, then immediately realised he had made a mistake and Ferris had feignted. He had left himself open and Ferris took the opportunity. Halt twisted around and managed to deflect the blade, but the movement caused him to lose his balance and he fell on the cobblestones.

Ferris lunged at him and he rolled out the way with a shout. He expected his twin to relent so he could stand, but Ferris only attacked again. Halt threw his sword up over his face, using all the strength he possessed to stop the deadly arc of the blade.

He realised if he hadn't managed to stop the sword, his head would no longer be attatched to his body. He kicked at Ferris's knees and the other boy fell back. He scrambled to his feet.

"Time!" he croaked.

"Time!" Sir Darnley called in a louder voice. He stepped closer to Ferris.

"What was that, boy?" he growled.

Ferris's eyes shifted from point to point, never staying in one place for long. "A duel?" he said, his tone leaving no doubt that he thought the answer was obvious.

"You nearly killed me!" Halt said, shocked and furious. His heart was pounding from his near miss and he wiped the sweat from his brow.

Ferris shook his head, looking resentful. "Don't know what you're talking about," he said. "It's a duel, Halt. You attack people in a duel."

"I think that's enough for one day," Sir Darnley said.

This time, King Ronan did not slip a gold coin to Sir Darnley, nor did he congratulate Halt.

…...

Halt breathed the fresh air deeply. It was so fresh and sharp, cold enough to sting the back of his throat. The smell of rose petals wafted on the breeze, from the gardens. Halt didn't go to the gardens often. The immaculate, trimmed hedges and tidy plants didn't appeal to him. He preffered the wildness of the outdoors, but when he couldn't escape from Dun Kilty, he satisfied himself walking through the courtyard. At least the trees here, while surrounded in pavings, grew in their natural shapes.

"Good morning, Prince Halt!"

An elderly wagoner waved to him. He had a younger man with him, probably his son, and a young woman as well. Halt didn't know them, but he waved anyway.

The woman giggled and fluttered her fingers at him. The young man frowned at this and Halt assumed he was courting the woman. Halt bowed his head to her. Though he was polite, it irritated him that strangers knew who he was. He wasn't surprised by it, he just preferred to stay in the background.

"Must've been born in the wrong family," he muttered.

"What was that, sir?" the woman asked. He waved the question away.

He heard a scraping sound behind him and turned. A large section of roof tiles came clattering down. He leapt forward with lightning reflexs. The tiles hit the bag of his legs. He yelled in pain and fell forward, involuntery tears springing to his eyes.

He caught a glimpse of a familier face on the roof. Ferris. He looked furious, his face twisted with such hatred that Halt felt they didn't resemble each other at all in that moment.

What was his twin doing on the roof? And why was he looking so angry?

Vagually, he heard the wagoner and his companians rushing over to him.

"A healer, call a healer!" the wagoner yelled and the young man shot off.

That was all Halt noticed before the blackness closed in on him.

…...

Halt limped into his sisters room. She hurried to support him, but he waved her away. She wouldn't be able to hold his weight and he didn't like feeling helpless.

His legs were shredded with deep wounds to the bone. They were painful and it hurt badly to walk, but the healer said he would make a full recovery. He had never been so badly injured in his life, nor had he ever been in that much pain. Yet it wasn't the physical pain the bothered him.

He had come up with only one explanation for Ferris's behaviour. And deep in his heart, he knew he was right. He had always known. The little looks, the tensing of his shoulders, the pain in his eyes everytime their father said he was proud of Halt. Always, Ferris had desired the crown, but lately that desire had turned into something else. A greed, a craving, a desperation to be king.

Halt had known, as he knew now, that his brother wanted the throne badly. Badly enough to kill his brother.

"What is it?" Caitlyn asked.

He sat down heavily on her bed, resting his legs. She sat down beside him, staring up at him with adoring dark eyes. How could he ruin her innocence? And yet, he felt if he didn't tell her, he wouldn't be able to tell anyone. He would suffocate in his own feelings of betrayal.

"It was Ferris," he blurted out before he could change his mind. "He pushed down the roof tilings. He was trying to kill me. I saw his expression."

Caitlyn recoiled. "It was an accident, I'm sure. Such things happen Halt!"

"It was no accident," Halt told her. "Remember our duel? He tried to kill me then too. I'm sure of it. Ever since I got ill, he's been different."

A horrible tthought occurred to him. "It was like a doorway had opened and a new Ferris stepped out. Only it wasn't a new Ferris, it was a Ferris we all knew was there, dormant under his crybaby persona. He'd always been this person, he just let his bitterness take over. Perhaps even then, he poisoned my food. He tried to kill me and he has ever since."

"The doctor said it was food poisoning!" Caitlyn said. She had never got along with Ferris, but it was against her nature to think poorly of her relatives.

"No, he said it _must_ be food poisoning because he couldn't fathom any other reason I might get sick," Halt corrected her. "He then said it was unlike any food poisoning he'd ever encountered. In fact, he said it had more relation to a common poison."

Caitlyn stared at her lap. "I do remember that vaguelly," she said. She looked up. "I think you're right."

Halt started. He had hoped she would disagree. That way, it would be harder to believe himself. But if Caitlyn, sweet, innocent, Caitlyn agreed with him, they must surely be right.

"I feel like I've always known," she said. "He has such hatred in his face sometimes."

"Yes," Halt agreed. He thought of their mother, with her constant, almost hysterical assurances that they were a happy family. "Happy family my foot," he said.

Caitlyn bit back a sob. Halt put an arm around her. She was only nine and it must be hard for a nine year old to realise her brother was an attempted murderer.

"Why?" she asked. "Why would he do that?"

Halt sighed. "He wants the throne of Clonmel. He's always wanted it. He won't let anyone stand in his way."

"And you?" Caitlyn asked. "Do you want this throne that people would kill for?"

Halt turned away from her. "I would rather have a good horse," he said. "A map, maybe, and the freedom to ride wherever I wanted to go." He added in a softer tone, "and I would rather have my brother back."

…...

It was a few weeks later that Halt decided to tell his parents. He couldn't stand being on edge all the time, wondering if his brother would try again to kill him. The castle had become even more suffocating then usual. Perhaps if he could just talk to his parents, they could do something to talk Ferris out of it. And maybe, Halt might get more favour in the Queens eyes when she knows her angel is a cold blooded murderer.

He hesitated in the corridor. Instinctively, he pressed into the shadows, staying still to conceal himself.

"Why can't you spare five minutes to talk to me!" Queen Hayley's shrill voice echoed down the corridor.

"For crying out loud, can't you stop nagging! Be with me, talk to me, hug me, kiss me! Just shut up and let me be! You're a grown woman, not a baby!" Ronan thundered.

"Don't you love me anymore?" Hayley cried.

"Love is nothing, it's weak! I am a king, I put aside my love. I deal with duty and power, not love."

"You never used to be like this!"

"Then I used to be a fool!"

Halt swallowed. His parents had been arguing more and more lately.

Ferris suddenly came hurtling down the hall. Halt pushed against the wall, wanting to disappear. His brother didn't see him, or if he did, he took no notice.

"Ferris," Hayley said. There was no more yelling and their voices came in undistinguishible mumurs.

Halt crept forward. The door was slightly ajar and he peered through. They spoke of trivial things that he didn't bother to listen to. Ferris was telling them about something one of his tutors said.

The important thing was that they were all smiling and happy. Ferris was beaming like he used to when he was younger. Hayley was smiling all over, though there was a red mark on her cheek. Ronan was smiling too, however his skin was pale and their were dark shadows under his eyes. The king hadn't been feeling well lately, but Halt assumed it was a minor sickness that would pass.

There had been an unhappy air around his parents recently. That air was gone now, with Ferris babbling on and suddenly, Halt couldn't bring himself to take that happiness away.

…...

A year passed. A lot happened in that year and, at the same time, nothing happened. Ferris was perfectly nice to his siblings and Halt began to doubt himself, then there would be a look or a glare and Halt would once more be certain of Ferris's intent.

Their father never recovered from his sickness and stayed in bed, slowly deteriorating. Hayley cried by his side all day long. Dun Kilty was waiting to see if he would recover. It was seeming less and less likely.

Ferris had approached Halt and offered him a grin.

"Dun Kilty has never been so stuffy," he said. "Come on a fishing trip with me?"

Halt's mouth dropped open. He could barely remember the last time they went fishing together. Maybe Ferris was afraid of losing their father and didn't want to lose Halt as well.

"Alright," Halt said.

So here they were, out on the lake, salmon fishing. It was a calm day and Halt was pleased that he didn't feel too queasy.

"The lines tangled," Ferris pointed out.

"I'll get it," Halt said. He'd never been a good fisherman, but this wasn't so bad. Maybe he could become better at it. He leaned over the side of the boat and reached for the line.

Slam! Something whacked into his back. He tumbled forward. The water rushed up to meet him. It filled his mouth. He coughed, but that only made more water flow in. Under the surface, all was oddly quiet and calm, even though he himself was panicking.

He pushed up to the surface. Air! Sweet air! He took great gulping gasps of it. Ferris, who looked alarmed, was reaching out to him with the oar. Halt swam towards it, trying to grab hold to pull himself aboard.

The oar slammed into his shoulder, sending him back under the water in a swirl of bubbles. Once more, he pushed to the surface. This time, Ferris swung at him and pushed him under again.

Ferris was trying to kill him, Halt realised. His heart turned to ice. He could expect no help from his twin.

He swam down, deeper into the lake. Under the boat he went. He was tempted to close his eyes and let it all end there, he could sink to the very bottom where no one could touch him. It was peaceful here at the bottom of the lake. Seaweed danced past his eyes, his own little welcoming ritual.

Unbidden, Caitlyns face flashed in front of him. Her dark eyes alight with laughter, her mouth curved in a delighted smile. Strands of her dark hair blew on her face, the rest of it tangled together as wild as her spirit. Her amulet flashed gold around her neck.

"Halt!" she called. "Play with me!"

How could he leave her without even a goodbye?

He swam forward. His lungs were about to burst. He propelled himself up with his legs. His head broke the surface. He took a raggid breath, then swam as fast as he could too the shore.

He dragged himself up. His head was spinning and he coughed up water.

"Halt, I'm sorry!" Ferris had already beached the boat. He reached out to help his twin. Halt pushed him away.

"You tried to kill me," he growled.

"No! I was trying to help! I-"

"Save it," Halt snapped. He couldn't live like this anymore. He had to leave. He had to leave Hibernia altogether. He could never be safe here, unless he killed Ferris. And he couldn't do that. He couldn't kill his own brother, no matter how much he hated him. Perhaps it was cowardice. Killing Ferris would be like killing himself, they were that similar. Like watching himself die.

"The crown obviously means much more to you than it does to me," Halt said. "It's worth your brothers life. Goodbye Ferris."

He strode up to the castle, sopping wet and refusing to listen to his twin's protests.

…...

He told Caitlyn all that had happened. She clung to him, sobbing.

"Don't go, Halt! I love you, don't go!"

He gently pried her hands away.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I love you too, Cait. I just can't live this way anymore."

He smiled gently at her. His eyes were dry. He would not cry. In his heart, he knew he was doing the right thing.

Caitlyn saw that she couldn't persuade him other wise. She untied the amulet from around her neck.

"Here," she said. "Please, take it. For good luck and so you...don't...forget..." Her shoulders shook and she couldn't speak anymore. With shaking hands, she tied the amulet around Halt's neck.

"I'll never forget you," Halt said. "Even if we never see each other again. Even if we grow old and grey and lonely. I will never, ever forget you."

He held her close. Someone please love her and care for her, he thought. Someone see her for who she is and make her happy. Give her a good home and a loving family.

Hours later, he walked out of Dun Kilty and headed for the port. He had a bag of few belongings over his shoulder and the amulet in a pouch around his neck. The string was flimsy and he didn't want it to break if things got rough. He felt it was safer in a leather pouch. By wrapping it in leather, it also couldn't be damaged easily and was easier to miss among his belongings if anyone dared to search his stuff.

The sun was warm on his shoulders, contrary to the feelings within him. In his minds eye, he could see a younger Ferris jumping up and down on a boat. "Fish! Fish!" he cried. He was young and untroubled then. Caitlyn was there too, smiling happily at the world around her.

He clutched the amulet and allowed his tears to fall.

**Come on, shout me a review ^^**

**Just out of interest, who would be interested in a sequel to Our Darkest Night"? Anyone? Anyone at all? **

**(in the sequel, Crowley will have red hair, now that I have had my epiphany) :D**


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